7/1/15

They all used to joke about Louis Noggin and how he'd forget his head if it wasn't attached, but then came the day when he even forgot that, leaving it on the beach while he and his pals all loaded themselves into their paneled station wagon to head home!

And so, after a harried and highly contentious competition, Elsie Reinhardt was finally able to winnow down to the top three participants in The 14th Annual Pickle Relish Boil Off.  Prized butter mint trays in bronze, silver and gold were granted to these ladies while the other entrant, Joanne Valmont, went home with a Kraft recipe book.

Some of the other privates found that they could never locate Rusty Handelman during their rare moments of recreation time until one day he was discovered nestled on his cot reading the scandalous and gossipy novel "Peyton Place!" Truth be told, though, he was really reading some of the more steamy sections over and over rather than the entire thing through...

Beatrice always counted the moments until her father went off to work and her mother started housework so that she'd be free to call Cathy Sue, Bonnie and Emma May in order to catch up on all the hot gossip such as who was still eating pablum for breakfast, who hadn't completed her toilet training yet and who pranced around town with too many ruffles on the seat of her underpants...

At first the guys at the frat house were worried about the fact that Mike Marshall had been raised next to a nuclear test site, but once they discovered how greatly he increased the television reception, they put all doubts aside and welcomed him warmly!

Though most people believed Fester Addams to have been a lifelong bachelor, the truth is that he did enjoy a weekend elopement in 1947 with Nadine Braumeister, but the union was quickly annulled when she discovered on her honeymoon that it was his hobby to collect dead mice and hide them in her underwear drawer...