2/27/15

Both Bridget and Mike were equally eager to prove to Seraphina that they knew best how to feed little Augie. And in the end, Seraphina had to admit that Bridget's bottle went down much more smoothly than the half a piece of toast that Mike folded up and forced in!

The other 364 days of the year were boring, dull, unexciting ones compared to the effervescent ecstasy that accompanied Judith's birthday...

Melody took time out for a quick photo prior to her first day as a ticket agent for Piedmont Airlines, though it annoyed her that Dad was already clambering for a few "leftover" foil packets of smokehouse almonds that she should bring home.

Fed up with being seen as stodgy, Herb and the rest of his Dixieland band decided to incorporate new costumes and accessories and renamed themselves The Papas and the Papas in order to appeal to a new market.

Though it seemed like a coup at the time he landed it, Morley was now beginning to wonder how he ever chose to interview Emmanuel Fejo when he could instead have had a thirty minute sit-down with Henry Kissinger.

Cleta kept wondering why Bonnie seemed to be enjoying Christmas so much more than at any other previous time. Then she got a whiff of the "coffee" she'd been sipping on since the family had arrived!

2/25/15

And so, sadly, one more Christmas snapshot was blown because Henry got into the JuicyFruit gum and, with five sticks in his mouth at once, began to slobber onto Sophie's holiday dress...

The Wanholer Family had the best trained dog in the neighborhood when it came to Josephine. Not only was she great about using the outhouse they'd constructed for her, but she even used the stone walkway to get there rather than traipse through the grass!

Wanda made the dreaded mistake of scooting across the hallway in her bra and panties to use the rest room while Tish and Lorri were still awake during the sleepover.

Elegance was in full bloom at the eighth annual meeting of the Delta Kappa Jamma "Promise Luncheon," though, for a few of the participants, the promise was starting to wear a bit thin...

It took Althea and Racine an agonizing four and a half hours to finally locate the reunion out at Soggy Creek Campground and Seed Farm only to find that all but a half dozen people had already left and they'd forgotten the egg salad back at home on the kitchen counter.

Surely one of the most momentous days in Jackie's life was being named First Lady... of Manassas, Virginia when her husband Jerry Cannady was elected mayor.

2/23/15

It had already been a rather barren, Charlie Brown Christmas sort of tree before Annalise ate all the popcorn garland. Now she was starting in on some of the cookie ornaments!

Sherilyn posed for a quick snapshot before heading to the sitter's to drop off Amy, who didn't coordinate well enough with her outfit to be allowed to tag along that afternoon.

Tovah and Saul's wedding had gone off without a hitch, but the reception did hit a minor speed bump when ring bearer Jacob picked all the cherry tomatoes out of the head table's salad bowl and ate them before anyone had sat down for dinner!

Considering that mother-of-the-bride Joyce was also going to be a grandmother in a scant four months, she decided to keep the mood light amongst the bridal party, though one or two of her jokes did annoy groomsman Cliff.

Sister Mary Joan felt that two warnings were enough and that if the class didn't settle down after that, she intended to shut off the projector, turn up the lights and forget about watching "Going My Way" altogether!

Though it took some heavy persuading, Isaac, Taylor and Zac finally managed to wring the $250 start-up money out of their father in order to create their band, "Cranial Trauma."

2/20/15

Diane and Denise, recent graduates of the Zombie School of Dentistry, took time for a quick snapshot prior to beginning their careers as the resident tooth extractors over at Dr. Chisel's practice.

Vanessa allowed Charmain to sit up in the armchair only when company was over and only so long as she was careful to place her paws over the burn holes in the upholstery...

Burnside, Arizona had very strict jaywalking bylaws and even employed a special agent, George, to zip around town enforcing the policy at every given opportunity.

Since she was a little girl, Cynthia had dreamed of a church wedding, but her restaurateur groom wasn't up for it. He did, at least, compromise and ask busboy Malcolm to put up an appropriate mural for atmosphere.

Everyone agreed that the Stepington Fourth of July Parade was fun, but would have been a whole lot more pleasant, and in the end less messy, had someone taken Snoopy for "a walk" before allowing him to fall in with the rest of the revelers.

Roxanne was so thrilled with her bust enhancement supplements that she doubled up on them, never even bothering to read the label which gave earnest warnings about the possibility of excess facial hair when taken in large doses...

2/18/15

And so it was with great relief that Chester made it to the state line, where cross-dressing laws were far less stringent and "Hester" could wander about more freely...

The debate raged between Lorelei and her mother Bernice versus her father Clyde, who disagreed that meeting his daughter's boyfriend for the very first time warranted anything more than just a white tank t-shirt.

Little Tiffany always got exactly what she wanted, on her birthday or any time, and thus Josie gave in and special ordered this get-up from the little-known Frederick's of Hollywood Pint-Sized Catalog.

Shirley Mae didn't cotton to a whole lot of new products, but she listened to Earl's spiel about Silk-a-Wax face cream because at the end of it, he gave away $0.40 off coupons for Jean Nate body splash...

Newman was really only so-so on the scratching post with it's attached bongo-chick that Elise bought for him, but he played with it diligently until she went to work and he could start in on shredding all the drapes and upholstered furniture in her apartment.

Robert Paul didn't have to go to school on days like this, but he was assigned to cleaning off his daddy's car so that he could make it down to the plant okay. Thing was, he didn't own a scraper and the boy could only get the bottom half of the car good and clean!

2/16/15

Brenda had wished and waited all her life for a Prince Charming to come and sweep her off her feet and just as she was beginning to think that somehow it may not happen, there was Filbert...

At first glance, it might seem like this was the best birthday party little Tracy ever had, until you realize that Tracy is in the black blouse with lace trim and that her "friend" Christy had decided to commandeer the cake for this picture.

Weeks of landscaping work had left Gary with some seriously uneven tan lines so he headed to the beach on Saturday with 100 spf on his forearms and butter flavor Crisco on his shoulders and chest in order to try to balance things out!

And so an otherwise uneventful day at the beach for Bobbie and Myron was changed forever when they happened to be swallowed by a rogue whale!

The previous hour and sixteen minutes of the party had been nothing but a dull, dreary warm-up for the inevitable arrival of Marjorie and her acoustic guitar, both of which brought new life to the proceedings even though she only knew three songs by heart...

Tricia had wanted a lovely holiday picture of herself and daughter Kimberly, but since Kimberly had thrown a tantrum and was in time-out, Tricia opted to pose with her portrait instead, thus ensuring a pleasant snapshot for that year's album...

2/14/15

Happy Valentine's Day from Krazy Kaptions!

Chet could hardly believe that Stu left him for Wanda, just so he could be crowned King at the Elks Valentine's Day Party!

2/13/15

Following an afternoon of total confusion, Jeannie and Cliff decided once and for all that no more than one camera at a time would be permitted at their birthday and holiday parties from now on...

Another hot time during the annual reunion of retirees from Crampton Tool & Dye, this time held in Fullerton, Maryland. Barney Squeezum, however, was quoted as saying that if any more people joined in next year, they'd have to upgrade from a deluxe queen-bed room to a king suite!

Mallory, as a rather sheltered upcoming bride, completely misunderstood about the shower that her coworkers at Morton's Insurance threw for her and showed up to the event with an umbrella!

Jennie was embarrassed to find she was shy three or four apples in order to make Bill his pie, so, desperate, she took a chance that cranky neighbor Mr. Barker wouldn't notice a few missing from the east side of his tree...

Easily one of Carl's favorite side trips during the Stand-Up Freezer Convention in Reno, Nevada was to The Bum Nickel Saloon, where he was laying odds on Amanda to keep him company that evening.

The Fourth Street Elementary Killers were known locally as a savagely fierce pee wee football team and took no prisoners on the field. Johnny, however, second from the left in the back row, tended to be a weak link in their defense as he was most often wondering how long until he could use the bathroom...

Bonus Pic! Here, Mallory offers to protect bemused fellow coworker Sylvie from the upcoming "shower."

2/11/15

Betta may not have looked the picture of ecstasy during her wedding to Heinrich, but all that changed the week after when his children Sigrid and Hans were off to private school for everything except a few holidays here and there!

Carol Rae really felt that Trina could win the Little Miss Hoofer Dance-Off competition based upon her talent alone, but Grandma Evaline was taking no chances and installed jagged chrome spikes on the side of Trina's shoes for insurance...

In truth, Mrs. Chippendale didn't need to call in members of the Chesterfield Civil Defense League in order to erect her flag, but deep down she just wanted to see what they looked like at work in the stifling afternoon heat...

Though it had wound up costing her an additional $0.75 in the end, Bonnie Marie finally mastered the art of fitting both her face and all of her hair into the frame at the photo booth down at Rexall's Drug Store and Soda Fountain.

Over and over, Mrs. Willis had warned Clifton and Cleavon not to run through the lobby of Central Bank and Trust, screaming and hollering at the top of their lungs, because she knew that a new security guard had been hired who wouldn't hesitate to show them the door at the first provocation...

Mr. Pepperman really didn't approve of alcohol, much less at work, but he found over time that the gals down at his store, The Daffy Taffy, operated much more effectively and with more verve if they enjoyed a quick glass of champagne just before clocking in for the day.