Thursday, February 23, 2017

2/23/17

After assessing the situation from her guest bathroom window, Mrs. Snaptackle called up the office of Ground-Grinder Landscaping and told them she felt they mat have sent two too many workmen to pour her driveway...
Chet knew he wanted to enjoy one of the Mardi Gras street parties, but he also knew he had to be at work at 6:00pm, so he wore his uniform (as a bar back at Ben Dover's Cafe) to the party and could duck out around 5:50, still making it on time!
And so Kenneth realized that even though his Best Man Chuck had promised he was completely over his long ago dalliance with the bride Kathleen, her charisma was just too overpowering for Chuck to ignore.

Tuesday, February 21, 2017

2/21/17

The Duncan-Roberts condominium complex (at the corner of Allen St. & Guillerman Drive) determined that their security personnel should match the casual, but stylish, attitude of the place, so they gave Levon a $200.00 "uniform" budget for use at Van Leunens.
Inside-Out day at Jenner Elementary allowed the students to learn a great deal about what was lurking underneath the clothing of their classmates, especially since the kiddos were instructed to wear the undergarments of the opposite gender!
Elyse fell in love with her shower bouquet, made from all the ribbons off her many presents, and could hardly believe that her friends had somehow managed to match the exact color scheme of her 1974 wedding: yellow and blue and green and red and lilac and peach and lavender and...

Friday, February 17, 2017

2/16/17

Veronica actually liked the little layette that Christine had given her at her baby shower, but there was no way Connie was going to let her off the hook. She'd seen that very item on 70%-off Clearance at Ben Franklin and was sure to point it out!
Herbie Pratt loved to dig for oil in the back yard, much to the disdain of his mother Barbara, though she overcame her apprehensions about it stopped complaining once he located a gusher and later wound up as president of the Mobil Oil corporation!
Rex was so determined to be the first one into the water on Memorial Day Weekend down at Rock Bottom YMCA that he bounded across the fence and into the pool... only to find that they were still filling it!

Tuesday, February 14, 2017

2/14/17

Mrs. Bitmore wanted a shot of all three girls with their homemade Valentine's Day card holders, but SueAnn had to let hers go because their dog Scraps got ahold of it and chewed most of the "lace" trim from it!
At the DKG Keg Party, Kristi began to complain to her boyfriend Randy that he hadn't remembered to give her anything for Valentine's Day, so after 3 or 4 cups of Busch Light, he finally obliged!
Romance had permeated the air at the Tug Valley VFW Sweethearts Dance, but as the clock continued to tick towards 10:00pm, Anson (seated in the back) began to wonder if Sheila really intended to show up or not...

Thursday, February 9, 2017

2/9/17

A lot of poor college students played music, did stunts or magic acts in the street for enough money to make ends meet, but Darryl realized he didn't even have to bother with any of that and could rake in the dough by wearing his running togs and looking "available" to certain passersby.
Coley and the Peps were a star attraction during the Stars on Ice outdoor tour, but there was that one time in Houston where they wound up in slush up to their ankles by about the time of their third show of the day...
Yes, they all may have looked cute and innocent in their square dancing gear at Perkin's prior to heading to their Friday Night Falderal, but generally after 10:30, "swing your partner" took on a racier meaning for both The Keys and The Djarrs...

Tuesday, February 7, 2017

2/7/17

Ferdy was so dehydrated and exhausted from a full day's work at the Phillips 66 service station that he couldn't wait to come home and enjoy an iced tea. Unfortunately, his new roomie Rocco made it Long Island style!
Rosie Greer wasn't about to let a near-fatal car crash kill off her precious poodle RayAnn, so she underwent experimental surgery to conjoin the pooches head to her own shoulders so that they could continue to enjoy one another's company.
Venita Proan liked to live large, emulating her idol from Argentina in every possible way, even though Venita lived in Little Rock, Arkansas!

Thursday, February 2, 2017

2/2/17

Heather Anne got more than she bargained for when she headed over to Stu's for his first private dance lesson. She was all set to teach him the waltz when he up and unzipped his running suit top and began to show HER the lambada!!
What would have been a lovely Easter Sunday for Suzette and Edwina was irrevocably spoiled when their mother Patsy swung open the front door, knocking the girls off the front stoop and into the moist, muddy plot they called a yard!
Randall had been so thrilled with his Adidas ensemble and figured it would really draw attention down on Castro Street, but for some weird reason he actually began to repel more of the crowd than he attracted.

Tuesday, January 24, 2017

1/24/17

Editor's Note: Krazy Kaptions will be on a brief hiatus after today's posting until 2/2/17 as your webmaster is off to sunny Florida for a week! We'll be back with more kitschy kraziness soon!
Geraldine loved to keep her wedding photo to Bert on display for all to see, though after the third time he came home stumbling drunk after 2:30am, she added the rod and curtains so that she could cover it up at will...
Yes it was all smiles for Eldon and Myra Jo Wingbach and Brenda and Herman Schildkraut at the 6th Annual El Cahon Bowl, until Eldon lost his glasses during the after party and accidentally took Brenda home with him!
For his very first photo shoot as a freelance model, Ricardo wanted everything to be just so, but unfortunately moments after this shot, Mrs. Alverez tossed some murky water from her mop bucket out the third story window of their apartment building, hitting not only his Grand Prix, but him as well!

Thursday, January 19, 2017

1/19/17

Larraine was so disappointed when her husband Roger gave her a metal detector for her birthday, but one afternoon on a whim she took it to the shoreline of Litchfield by the Sea and came upon little Audrey, discovered solely due to the steel hinges of her eyeglasses!
Herman and Lily Munster felt certain that grown-up Eddie would stay at their house on Mockingbird Lane and raise his family there, but instead he bought a home in the suburb of Timber Creek and managed to assimilate himself amongst all the other residents...
Alphonso bided his time until finally one night The Sandersons went out for dinner and a movie, whereupon he could FINALLY attack and destroy the little cow figurine which had been mocking and taunting him for months now...

Tuesday, January 17, 2017

1/17/17

Having left Tiddlebrook years ago to attempt success in the record biz, it was always a little awkward for Phil to come home for the holidays and settle into the small town routine again. But thankfully, Aunt Nita still made one killer Screwdriver...
Not only was the torque so great that it pulled Angelique right out of her water skis, but for some reason the speedboat driver kept turning around to look at her instead of the water in front of him and eventually he ran aground!
A.J.'s toy steering wheel gave his sister Meredith ample training at being a backseat driver, which would come in handy later in life. This early experience made her an authority on failure to use a turn signal, irregular parallel parking, horn overuse and, most definitely, falling asleep at the wheel!