5/31/16

On one too many occasions during their stay in The Blue Ridge Mountains, Marty had been told "what a pretty daughter" he had whenever anyone looked at his son Robbie, so he decided to give him an impromptu haircut back at the campsite that was closer to his own!

While it couldn't be said that the entire weekend was a washout, Captain Stricker had to admit that since the last time he'd docked in New London, the adventuresomeness and skill levels of the prostitutes had gone down a bit.

Touring Pang-Shin was fun and all, but after his fourteenth pagoda, Abe was wheezing and having trouble staying upright. He soon declared he was ready to head back to the hotel for a communal bath and some saki...

5/30/16

Memorial Day Bonus Pics!

After Tip and Garry entered the whirlpool following their tennis match, Terry prayed with all his might that the jets would stay on until they left since he'd completely neglected to pack any swim trunks and had slithered in naked beforehand when no one was out there...

A little known fact about the much-heralded winning streak of the Filmont Flippers swim team: Local genetics had resulted in ears on 92.3% of the young men in town that could double as fins (and in some cases, oars!)

Vonetta knew how hot it was going to be that Monday and intended to float in the pool from morning till dusk, but unfortunately she neglected to tell her husband B.F where she'd scored the impromptu floats and he had three flat tires only 1/2 a block out of the driveway.

5/26/16

If there's one thing Irv hated, it was the oncoming of autumn, when all the leaves began to fall from the foliage in his neighbor Miss Fickeltaint's yard and he could no longer watch her through the window vacuuming topless without being spotted...

Whenever Gloria only had time to do one of two things, gossip on the phone or sweep the floor, she chose to gossip, but thankfully Murray followed her all around the kitchen as she chatted and his fur managed to catch 90% of the dust on her linoleum.

It wasn't enough for Bonita to throw the most glamorous Snowball Dinner and Mah Jong Tournament in New Rochelle. If Harvey and Whirladeen Quigley didn't show up, there was no point to any of it, but thankfully they did make an appearance.

5/24/16

Most of the ladies were having such fun at Rosalie Hedgeworth's Annual Outdoor Silent Auction and Belgian Waffle Buffet that only Cecilia noticed a considerable deposit of recent bird droppings on Rosalie's red crepe skirt...

An otherwise delightful party was spoiled once again by Myrna's husband Leroy as it was pointed out to her that, after one too many sidecars, he had slipped into her one-piece bathing suit and proceeded to dance along the diving board before falling in and splashing several onlookers...

Genevieve felt the grip tighten from her new groom Vito as they proceded down the aisle after the ceremony and she kept winking at old beaus and familiar, handsome acquaintances.

5/19/16

Until Joyceanne (far right) got married and the group became a double-act, Riki Tiki Tappy was a hot booking at quite a few VFW and Elks lodges as well as the occasional Shriner's awards dinner.

Lunch with Aunt Lucille was fun and all, though her sandwiches leaned towards dry, but was disappointed Sandra was that she could never get a word in edgewise. While Lucille prattled on about everyone in the neighborhood and most of the family, Sandra never did get to expound upon what happened on the bus or in the school cafeteria...

Phyllis was given strict instructions by her husband Carl that she could have all the fun she wanted to in Acapulco, but she was forbidden to bring home any more than one souvenir. Thus, on her last day there, she had to decide between her fetching straw hat... or Ramon.

5/17/16

During the group photo from the Bela Floppe School of Diving, Rudi felt a tad self-conscious about his waistline and wished that he could be more like Heinrich, who had no problem letting it all hang out.

Angie was proud of the blind date she set up between Vinnie and Deborah, though, while Deborah thought Vinnie was something of a fox, he wasn't able to return her feelings and, in fact, thought she was a dog...

Grandma McCall was so proud of the girls' Home Ec clothing projects that she demanded they both model them immediately, even though Bonnie only got a D+ for her blouse and Beth got a B- for her apron...

5/12/16

Sheila emerged from her condo to meet up with her blind date Gary, but was faced with a bizarre dilemma. Her neighbor Gail was also scheduled for a blind date. So Sheila had to try to figure out which guy, not to mention which car, was meant for her!

Gary Morton, Lucille Ball, Lucie Arnaz and Desi Arnaz Jr had become so mobbed by fans at airports that they began sending these remarkable stand-ins on a separate flight to draw attention away from them while they rode coach under heavy disguises...

Spidey Day at Swinging Limbs Kindercare was spoiled to a degree for Cleavon because just before leaving his house, their dog Vic yanked his mask off and ate it, thinking he was a burglar!

5/10/16

After two straight sleepless nights thanks to Renato's colic, Martine bundled him up and ran him down to Knapp's Tavern for a quick hot toddy made with 90-proof whisky. As a bonus, they were also known for their great, er..., pies!

Jerry and Burt knew that they'd have to make it from Columbus, Ohio to Fort Lauderdale, Florida in record time during spring break, so they wired Jerry's cousin Dom in Kentucky and had him change out all the speed limit signs before their trip!

Alphonse was desperate for Tisa and Ramon to breed and keep their lineage going. After one too many false starts, he finally got them a romantic room at the Hyatt, which had worked for his now-wife Brenda, right down to the Kahlua on the rocks!

5/5/16

...And so with one great sock-'em move, Reginald won the volleyball game for his team. This not only led to a subsequent winning streak, but also paved the way for a great summer relationship with Chester, whose congratulatory hug lingered just a bit longer than usual and was surprisingly tantalizing.

For weeks Robbie had agonized over whether Ronda Kay would answer positively when he finally proposed to her and, much to his delight, she did let out a muffled "yes!" after a bit of cajoling...

Everyone else from the Dingling Brothers circus told the high wire act The Daring Bendozies that they needed to break away and enjoy some quality time at the beach, but in the end they just couldn't seem to leave their work behind.

5/3/16

Second day at the river camp and already Tammy June was disgusted and disappointed because her new step-dad Orville had eaten up all but half a slice of the pepper loaf she'd bought at Publix deli especially for the week ahead...

Nolan Hills portrait studio was famous for their appealing familial arrangements, but sometimes - such as in this case with The Yonners - the precise sittings and wide variety of stagings took so long that the subjects began to let their minds wander (or in some cases even became hostile!)

Teffanie hated the rough way that her mother Belinda styled her hair every morning and often wished that she could do what mommy did and just take her hairstyle from a wig stand and slip it on before heading outside!